


Just give me a Reason

by Misti1987



Series: Song Fics [2]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: :), Fix this, Guilt, Hope, Ian and Mickey talk, LOVVE, M/M, Sad, Season 6 can bite me, Soft conversation, bent not broken, post-season 6
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-07
Updated: 2016-05-07
Packaged: 2018-06-06 21:02:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6769783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Misti1987/pseuds/Misti1987
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Song:  Just give me a reason - P!nk </p><p>Ian and Mickey have a talk, and Mickey doesn't know what he wants until he does.  They can fix this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just give me a Reason

**Author's Note:**

> I needed some gallavich hope today, and I love this song so... Here it is.

Songfics: Just give me a reason - Pink

 

 

 

_It's in the stars_

_It's been written in the scars on our hearts_

_We're not broken just bent_

_And we can learn to love again_

 

Mickey sat across from Ian, staring at him, not knowing what to say. There weren't enough words to describe the feelings soaring through his body right now, what were the right ones? How to describe the way he felt right now? How he had felt ever, too many emotions. "I'm sorry." he heard the words but they didn't register, he didn't know if they helped, Ian, saying this to him. Was it even possible to convey all of this in that? Did he want an apology? Did he want to issue one himself?

 

 

 

Ian had taken everything he had thought he knew about himself at one point and ripped it all away. Slowly Ian had worked his way into Mickey's heart and there he would stay forever possibly but it didn't erase any of this. It didn't take it away or make it better, did it make it worse? He wasn't really sure.

 

 

 

It was true that Ian could still see inside of him, he could tell as Ian's sad face looked at him, he knew that he knew it wasn't enough, that Mickey was broken, and Ian, in fact, was still broken himself. Was that because they broke up? Was it because Ian was sick, was it because Mickey felt like he couldn't help him anymore? Mickey didn't actually know any of it. He just sighs, not saying a word.

 

 

 

What had happened to the man that could fix anything with his smile, or at least thought he could. That was the Ian he loved. The Ian who's smile lit up his entire world, the man that had the world at his fingertips, not this man who was looking at him with all of this guilt. He could see it. Ian felt guilty for making promises they both knew he couldn't or wouldn't keep.

 

 

 

"I don't know if sorry helps this, Ian." Mickey finally says and Ian nods.

 

"I know it doesn't. But I have to say it. Mick...I'm so fucking sorry. I'm an asshole. everything you did...for me...and I...I'm an asshole. To my family, to him...and most of all to you." Ian says sadly.

 

Him...He didn't even want to talk about that. The asshole that Ian moved on to...But how had he been an asshole to him? Ian shrugs obviously understanding the silent question and the look on his face saying he didn't want to voice the words.

 

 

 

 

"Ian..." Mickey says.

 

"I...I..." Ian hangs his head. "he asked if I was still in love...with you." Ian says.

 

"oh?" Mickey just says, not really wanting to know the answer to that but at the same time needing to. Had Ian been in love with him? Still...or ever?

 

"I...couldn't lie...so I just told him...He's not happy with me." He says silently, not actually saying the words.

 

 

 

"You...you said...You...Fuck" Mickey can't even complete the fucking sentence.

 

"Um...of course I am...What we had, what I threw away, it's not something that goes away just because it hurts Mickey." Ian says silently.

 

 

 

 

"I know that...Fuck I know that, but you never..." He trails off.

 

"What? Said it? I loved you, long before you ever loved me, Mickey. Maybe before I even knew it." He says.

 

 

"Then why...Why'd you leave? If you love me." Mickey says

 

"I set you free...Free from me. I'm a mess, still, even medicated, I'm still a disaster." Ian says.

 

 

 

"That wasn't your decision Ian. I fucking loved you...Love you. You don't get to make that call. I wasn't trying to fix you, just trying to love you." Mickey says a tear slipping down his cheek.

 

 

 

"and now...You want to be free of me? after everything I did. To forget you." Ian asks. Mickey looks into those sad eyes, the eyes that were empty, not too long ago, but are now filled with regret.

 

 

 

"And now I don't know. I'm not free. Don't you get that? I was never free without you." Mickey says reaching out to hold Ian's hand.

 

 

 

 

 

"I miss you so much, Mickey." Ian lays his head down on the table as Mickey slides his hand away from him. When Ian doesn't move, Mickey walks to the other side of the table and leans down to him.

 

 

 

"And what do you want to do about that?" He lightly touches Ian's face.

 

 

 

"I can't ask you for what I want. I don't deserve you." Ian whispers.

 

 

 

"Not what I asked Ian...What the fuck do you want?" Mickey says voice raising slightly and Ian looks into his eyes.

 

 

 

"What I want...I want you to look at me like you used to. I want you to love me...and I want to kiss you, and never stop." Ian turns away.

 

 

 

 

Mickey moves his hand and turns Ian's face towards his own.

 

"Look at me." He says

 

 

 

Ian looks up and Mickey leans over just slightly and places a kiss, a soft kiss, on Ian's lips. "We both got here, not one of us, both of us. What do you want to do about it?" Mickey asks, not caring who is looking at them, in this small diner.

 

 

 

 

Ian seems to understand a little better. "I just want you, Mickey."

 

"Are you going to leave me again?" Ian sighs at that.

 

"I..I don't know. My head...It's fucked...probably forever."

 

"Do you love me, Ian?"

 

"Yes...Fucking Yes." Ian says, his eyes have a tiny light in them.

 

 

 

"Then just do that. Can you do that? I'm going to want to take care of you...You have to be okay with that." He says finally and Ian nods.

 

 

 

 

 

"We...Can...Fix...this...not today...but we can..." Mickey draws out and Ian smiles, and it's a beautiful sight because Ian hasn't smiled at him in a really long time.

 

 

 

 

Ian reaches out to kiss Mickey again and Mickey lets him.

 

 

 

 

And right there, Mickey feels a little better, because he can fix this, they can fix this. His Ian is in there somewhere and he has every intention of finding him again.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sure if I'm satisfied with this. but eh.


End file.
